love and youtube.

{and here is why:   }

preface:  don't wonder why i always dwell on this fact, just read, agree, and move on.

our generation is weird.  we have to know what everyone, people we know, people we wish we knew, and even people who don't even exist, is doing at every second of everyday.  whatever.  what is even weirder, youtube.  random videos, made by random people, commented on by complete strangers, viewed by a whole bunch of random people all day, everyday.  weirdies for sure.  and i am guilty as charged.
i have had an unusual spike of appreciation for the following...

1.  laughing babies.  

actually i just like babies in general.  and where i come from, that is ok and not creepy.

2.  odd animal behaviors.  

where i come from this is actually kinda not ok and totally creepy.

3.  musically gift children with a real knack for song writing.  

before you decide that you don't want that 12 year old's voice singing about the days of the week 

{seen here for the cave dwellers and anyone who wasn't driving around byu on friday afternoon 

since that was the most played song to pump while crusin down university ave that day}

because you are as afraid as i am about having it stuck in your head for all time{again}

...stop...because that is not what the original link is...it's better.

oh and you are so welcome for wasting your day.  well, if you think youtube is a waste.  i don't.  i feel significantly uplifted by this selection.  hope you feel the same.  

i've figured it all out.

you should know that i heart gossip girl.
kinda a guilty pleasure of mine since being introduced to her in the greatest home theater of our time.
for those unfamiliar with the premise of the show, just watch the vid above and there you have it, gg in a nutshell.  also notice that gossip girl, like myself, is a fan of the double negative.  i am about 85% sure that gossip girl says:  "and who am i...that's not a secret i'll never tell..." so does that mean that she is going to reveal herself?  that we will someday know the face behind that sinister voice of gossip? that all of life's questions will one day be answered by the lady of scandal herself?  only time will tell.
you know you love me.
xoxo
gossip girl.

lava horror picture show.

there are 2 questions in life that i just simply cannot answer.  yes, only 2.  those questions are...

1. why aren't there more horror movies about the salem witch trials?
2. why aren't there any horror movies about lava hot springs, idaho?

i'll get to #1 someday, but my focus right now is on #2, seeing that i was just there for the annual wightman getaway.  for those who have experienced the wonder that is lava hot springs can attest but for those who have not found one minute in their lives for this trip, here are my top 10 {actually 8..because that is all i could come up with...but 10 is a better number when it comes to lists so...}reasons why lava hot springs is a perfect candidate for the next classic horror film.

1. LAVA hot springs.  lava= hot.  hot=hell.  hell=scary.
2. lava HOT springs.  synonym for hot=attractive.  attractive=beyonce.  beyonce=illuminati.  illuminati=satan.  satan= hell.  and as you already know, hell=scary.
3. steam.  hot pools+cold air=steam.
4. cold.  okay this contradicts reasons 1 and 2 but as all horror movie buffs already know horror and contradictions go hand in hand.  prime example:  the orphanage.  tell me, why should a woman run an orphanage for children with special needs when she can't even keep track of her own kid?  contradiction.  anyway it is really chilly in lava hot springs {maybe because i have only gone there in the dead of winter but whatev} and cold=ghosts.  ghosts=scary.
5. location.  there would be no need for set design.  there are cliffs and a train track nearby.  random hotels that have been there since the beginning of time. steam {so no need for a fog machine} and a creepy bridge.  all kinds of naturally frightening elements.
6. residents.  there is no need to hire extras for a lava horror movie since the town is crawling with winners already.  especially the owner of the breakfast place {that us wightmans hit up yearly by tradition on our lava getaway} that got into a heated argument/boarder line knife fight with the man delivering uniforms for his workers.  i never knew anyone could be so passionate about uniforms.
7. it's in idaho.  nothing good happens there. 
8. this one is far fetched but that is how the end of all of my lists are.  everyone there is in swimsuits.  including women.  and if low budget horror films love anything it is gore mixed with women in a small amount of clothing. hello...piranha 3D??

so any film makers want to join me?  i thought of some great script ideas over the long weekend.

and here is me in lava hot springs...before it gets famous.

{scary, right??}

confreakingfusing facefreakingbook.

facebook is annoying sometimes.

i know that is the cool thing to say.

and usually the people who say it the most are either

a.  people who are 100% facebook addicts and say those words about their beloved site because their crush will not accept their friend request.

b.  they are cool hippies that don't use any social networking or any type advanced technology of any shape.

i, however, am neither of these examples.

i love a good status update.

i live to stalk people who have cooler lives than me.

i occasionally take pictures and think to myself "prof pic!"

but still.

i reserve the right to say "facebook is annoying sometimes."

so i will say it again.

facebook is annoying sometimes.

example:

this private person

{that i personally went to the trouble disguising so you won't be creepy stalkers and add her on facebook just so you can hunt me down and try to be my best friend {woah just kidding}}

is sick.

as you can see in her status.

my question is what these 3 people "like" so much about that.

imagine if this were real life:

you:  i am so sick.

me:  *two big giant thumbs up and a cheesy grin to match*

you:  no really.  like i am near death.  i made out my will and everything.

me:  i like that!

you:  rude. *hack up a lung*

me:  YES!  i love it!!  *high five*

you: *leave me hanging*

not nice.

but i almost hate comments about a dislike button more.

like this...

there isn't a dislike button.

we've tried to get one

and we have failed.

move on.

here's looking at you, kid.

{me.  staring.  at you.}

i have a nasty habit. i stare a lot.  not always on purpose.  sometimes i'll be looking in a general area then get lost in a thought {you know i have a lot of those...} then an individual standing in aforementioned general area will notice my gaze and either call out my social flaw or immediately feel uncomfortable by my presence.  and let it be known, sometime i really am staring.  generally at a polynesian {has it been made clear yet that i have an intense draw towards those from "the islands"?} or a cool indie person with awesome shoes{again, you know me..}  either staring on accident or staring on purpose, we all do it.  so because i love you, i will let you in on my little secret...

3 ways to get yourself away from an awkward, accidental staring contest.

1. continue staring and say "what?" this makes the person that caught you staring feel like the offender. they'll quickly feel embarrassed and look away, giving you social safety.
2. find something behind or near the person {clocks, other people, a house...all work well for option 2} and act really, really interested in it.  works best if you point out said interesting thing to someone near you and get them to seem really, really interested as well.
3. practice looking away really quick.  tips:  look with your eyes, not your head. pulling a willow smith will totally blow your cover.  be smooth.  make it natural. 

use this tool. it will help you, as it does me every single day.  so stop embarrassing yourself and just get back to staring!  i know you want to.

in your head.

i heard once that sickness is all mental, that if you tell yourself you aren't sick, you won't be.  it's just that simple...or at least it's worth a try.  so if anyone asks, tell them that my nose isn't stuffed up to the point that if i close my mouth for one second that i feel like i might suffocate.  tell them the skin around my nose isn't read or raw or burning.  my body doesn't ache like a gray haired, old lady.  tell them my voice doesn't sound like a squeaky, quieter, man version of my real one.  and, just in case anyone asks, tylenol pm and vicks vapor rub scented tissues aren't my best friends right now.  run and tell that.

please explain.

{see #5 and this will make more sense.}

sometimes i just don't understand things.  i don't understand why they exist or how they work.

examples:

1.  traffic.

if everyone is going the same speed and headed in the same direction at the same time, how come we come to a complete stop?  i don't understand.

2.  american cheese.

why would anyone choose processed orange colored plastic over the real thing?  i don't understand

3.  fireworks.

who invented this?  and how the freak did they do it?  how can they have different shapes, colors, sizes, sounds?  i don't understand.

4.  how every snowflake is different?

is that really true?  if so, crazy.  if not, why would someone lie about that?  i don't understand.

5.  bald men with full beards.

how come they can't grow hair on their heads, but can on their faces?  or can they, and they just choose to be bald headed and full faced?  i don't understand.

remind me why i'm not a party planner already?

today.
i had the greatest idea ever.
feel free to copy the idea after i use it first.

idea...

homecoming shower.

{i'm saddened by the fact i feel inclined to include this but by homecoming i mean the return of a missionary, not the football game, dance party kind...though, on second thought, maybe the idea could apply to both.}

you know about wedding showers and baby showers i assume.  same concept:

• instead of bringing clothes for the new baby, bring clothes for the returned missionary, who, in more ways than one, are similar to newborns.  they need a little nudge in the right direction in the fashion world.  at courtney's party we will buy her some lucille elaine goodies.
• instead of offering tips on married life, offer tips on the music and movies they have no knowledge of.  they are new to songs and movies that are old news but blew our minds two years earlier.  at courtney's party we will introduce cocorosie and toy story 3 to her.
• instead of making chicken salad sandwiches with blue or pink slush, serve food from their area.  at courtney's party we will serve...uh...knock off georgetown cupcakes and whatever she says is cool.  in all reality, we will probably eat hires since she misses it so.
• instead of playing games like the "don't say words like 'temple,' 'marriage,' 'bride,'" game {make sense?}, play the "guess how long it will take for you to remember your first name isn't elder/sister" game. 

yeah.  best. idea. ever.  i know, right?  courtney won't ever begin to know what hit her when i throw this party.  mark your calendars lovelies!

molding minds.

Q:  what food group does coconut belong to?

A:  fruit.

A:  nut.

A:  seed.

crazy, right?

totally my fave

fruit

nut

seed

of all time.

would it be alright by you if i de-greenify you?

no thanks.

i love green.

i go to uvu.

you have to like

green if you go there.

also my mother is a saint.

really.

she is.

so i carry her name around on a green pencil.

{my green-ness and my mama.}

why i could never be an english major.

i love double negatives.  i really think they are so powerful.

please don't not love them as much as i do.

food for thought.

have you

ever noticed that

beer can

{in a british accent}

sounds the same as

bacon

{in a jamaican accent}

?

click here to

think it over.

sound it out.

what is the point of

word varification?

how come i always feel the need

to read these "words"

out loud?

i mean,

what is

wfpmewd

anyways?

i think i'd like to work

for the word varification

company.
i would find the task
of making up nonsence words
and imagining people {like myself}
trying to read them
rather amusing.

huh?

there are some phrases used in everyday life that i just do not understand.  they sort of send shivers down my spine.  maybe you can help me understand why people feel the need to use these phrases...

• could care less

example:  "i could care less what you make for dinner tonight, i am starving!"
my confusion:  i think this phrase represents that the speaker doesn't care about something but if you could care less about something doesn't that mean you still have a little bit of care left to give?  meaning you care about it a little?  meaning you don't not care?  shouldn't the phrase be "i could not care less" about something?

• i had to laugh at that

example:  "i just had to laugh at that because it was so something she'd say!"
my confusion:  is laughing that big of a chore?  "i had to" makes me think that the speaker didn't want to laugh, but they had to.

• that being said

example:  "he is really super nice and attractive and is going to be a doctor someday.  that being said i think you should stay far away from him because he is bad news."
my confusion:  saying "that being said" just gives the speaker permission to go back on everything they just said.  a huge contradiction.  why even say the nice things before?

am i just crazy or are these phrases odd to you as well?  really.  help me out.

pop quiz.

{me.  pondering the question.}

Someone says to you,

"you're hair is long." 

what do you say/do in reply?

a.  "hey thanks" (was it really a compliment?)

b. applaud (stating the obvious can be a difficult task.)

c.  smile (because you don't know how to respond)

d.  run your fingers through it and say "i know right!"

answer: ...i don't know.  you tell me.

i wonder...

*who thought skater, also known as sk8r, shoes are an appropriate form of footwear.

*what i would do if there was an earthquake while i was in the shower.

*if people smile when they get my text messages the way the kid i saw at the bus stop did today.

*if i saw an actual JabbaWockee driving next to me and waving last night or if that was just the guy's face.

*why i've waited so long to reunite with my first true love {peanut butter and honey}.

*about my writing teacher. {just in general.}

?