can't stand ya.

if you have any question as to which school to attend, ask yourself just one question. do i want to hear presentations from world renown scholars and academics or do i want to meet famous people? if it is the latter, uvu is 100% the place for you. in the last year alone we have been the proud hosts of the family that the movie the blind side was based off of, the real coach boone from remember the titans, the real frank abignale jr from catch me if you can, the real coach carter, some guys that are pro legalizing of marijuana and most recently the real george costanza. yes JASON ALEXANDER! i saw him. at uvu. the place for you and anyone else who knows that the true value of entertainment will always outweigh intellect. so know that jas and i are tight {we spent 2 hours together} i figured that i had better tell you what you should know about him in case you happen to run into him at j-dawgs or sammies or monks or somewhere.

jason. 

1. weighed 220 pounds in the eighth grade.
2. first love: magic. don't ask him to show you a magic trick because he won't. also don't ask him to follow you on twitter...because he won't.
3. top three most watched shows: 3. colbert report, 2. family guy {boo}, 1. walking dead.
4. began acting based off of a lie {sound like anyone?} he told while flirting with a girl in the pool at magic camp.
5. first film was also holly hunter's first film and also harvey weinstein's first production.
6. claims that pretty women was a masterpiece made of garbage. meaning that it was made from outtakes. it was originally a totally different movie with a dark premise.
7. didn't think he had a chance getting the role of george sine the guy he was up against claimed to be jerry's bestie. so he went all out: wore thick ladies glasses and summoned his inner woody allen for his tryout. they called him right back and gave him the part.
8. doesn't have a favorite seinfeld episode but has a favorite george line.
9. greatest accomplishment: his kids {aw!}
10. HE ACTUALLY WEARS A HAIR PIECE because he had a full head of hair at the speech and i know for a fact that he's bald.

convinced that uvu is for you? you should be.
also, let it be known, seinfeld is the greatest sitcom of all time, past present and future.

knope.

 +

=

thanks.

i don't know whether to thank these lovely people for today's grateful rant for introducing this wonderful thing or the thing itself.  but today i am grateful for parks and recreation.  maybe i am thinking too highly of myself but is that not why i write a blog?  BUT i am pretty sure that if i had chosen to take the government path that i would be the leslie knope of taylorsville city.  however, everyone {aka one random stranger} is telling me that i give off more of an april vibe, which if you are a fan of the show {which i strongly recommend you to be} is a rather sad statement, but i'll accept it.

dear future boo.

to the future mr. paige,

just fyi...

i will not settle for anyone less than phil dunfy.

loves.

dr. deception and other diagnostic dilemmas.

the doctors on house must not be very good.  notice how they never diagnose and cure their patients on the first {or second...or third} try.  but also notice that their patients rarely die.  something to ponder while shopping for a hospital.

i've figured it all out.

you should know that i heart gossip girl.
kinda a guilty pleasure of mine since being introduced to her in the greatest home theater of our time.
for those unfamiliar with the premise of the show, just watch the vid above and there you have it, gg in a nutshell.  also notice that gossip girl, like myself, is a fan of the double negative.  i am about 85% sure that gossip girl says:  "and who am i...that's not a secret i'll never tell..." so does that mean that she is going to reveal herself?  that we will someday know the face behind that sinister voice of gossip? that all of life's questions will one day be answered by the lady of scandal herself?  only time will tell.
you know you love me.
xoxo
gossip girl.

true then, still true now.

2 more days!

till my baby's big day.

hello hello.

the festivities continue with

this favorite post.

p.s.

watch this

all you conan lovers you.

and be happy with me.

...

also,

look how cute my big sister is.

{i know, darling, right?}

the love affair continues.

now that the best thing that has ever happened to our television sets {since seinfeld, of course} is now taking a little break, i am having a bit more free time.  good thing the best thing that has happened to a good chunk of tv loving, wannabe dancers is on!  remember how many goodies this show has provided?  let me refresh your memory with my top ? dances...

1.  addiction.  what the?  so good.  goose bump good.  however, this song was the ring tone of a certain roommate of mine for her alarm clock.  at first i always though of this dance when i heard it and now, hearing the song again, just makes me tired due to the many days being awoken to the sweet sounds of sara bareilles.
2.  the hummingbird and the flower.  changed my whole idea of nature and may or may not have made me wish wade robson was single, younger, not as famous, lived in taylorsville, and was my prom date.
3.  bleeding love.  i must've been reading twilight {oops.  the cat's outta the bag.  i read and secretly love twilight...ugh.} when i saw this because mark has and always will remind me of edward.  i think you can see why.  beauty and grace.  i love it.
4.  butt dance.  i should dance this.  love the nightgown and love the...uh...focus.
5.  everything's content.  made me fall in love with good old lykke li.  love this.  love them.  actually this dance just makes me love everything.
and even though it's weird to end a list on this number...
6.  transformers.  shane sparks...i love you. 

if you just watched all of those videos and read all of this post...bless your heart.  now hurry!  so you think you can dance is on.  i'm rooting for the kid from ohio.  i love him.

and i'm going to stop now, before i start sounding like this girl from high school who knew everything about american idol and so you think you can dance and is frankly their #1 extremely obsessed, over the top, fan.  my apologies.

bye bye baby.

{elder thomas.}

remember how much i love tv?  still true and to be totally honest, i watch some pretty ridiculous stuff

including but not limited to:

jon and kate plus eight {pre catastrophy}

the biggest loser

the marriage ref

seinfeld

the food network

and the list goes on {for an unhealthy number of hours}

usually i will keep such information, or guilty pleasure more like, to myself so i can maintain my fine tuned reputation.  one day i let something slip.  i was something like, "who cheats on their wife when they have a set of twins and a set of sextuplets?!"  i quickly caught myself and i pretended like i wasn't really a tlc junkie.  but as my slip still clung to the air, justin said "i know right" and the rest of the night was spent discussing shows on tlc.  and yes, we ignored everyone who made fun of a small obsession with the network made for middle aged women.  my justin is as close to the male me as possible.  no wonder i admire him so much.  he can keep up with my seinfeld knowledge.  he is quite but easily one of the funniest silent people i know.  he went to my preschool, junior high, and high school and together we were legends.  and now that legend is headed off to brazil, to share his knowledge, strong testimony, and unbelievably adorable charm. 

 i love you, elder thomas.

p.s. he is the first to pinky promise letters.  what a gem.

small victories of single, urban life

i love seinfeld.
i literally cannot get enough of it.
watch this video
and you can go ahead and thank me later.

p.s.  i make myself sound like the laziest slob ever on this here blog,
with all the tv talk and the food obsessions, but i promise i have
more than this going for me.  just fyi.

the wait is over!

tonight!

at 8:28

the greatest show on tv returns.

don't forget!

a little sneak peek...

"Hell-o"

Rachel and Finn's romance

hits a rocky patch

when she becomes involved

with a competitor

(guest star Jonathan Groff),

forcing Mr. Schuester

to have a talk with the

competitor's coach

(guest star Idina Menzel).

freakin' out!

not yet a fan?

read this.

watch this.

and look at this.

another beauty.

 

{charlie chaplin.  a new favie.}

smile though your heart is aching;

smile even though it's breaking.

when there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by.

if you smile through your fear and sorrow,

smile and maybe tomorrow;

you'll see the sun come shining through for you. 

light up your face with gladness,

hide every trace of sadness.

although a tear may be ever so near,

that's the time you must keep on trying,

smile, what's the use of crying?

you'll find that life is still worthwhile,

if you just smile. 

i have to sing this song to me every night before bed while reminding myself that glee will be back in a few weeks.  and, ironically, i discovered this beauty on glee.  it couldn't be more fitting.  miss you like crazy finn, rachael, asian, other asian, and most definitely miss sue.  come home to me glee.

shame on you.

nbc.

consider our

long time

extremely loving

unconditional

relationship

over!

and for once

it IS you...not me.

because of this

i am boycotting nbc.

meaning no more watching

the office.

30 rock.

or the bachelor.

{yeah the bachelor...i am...i was a huge fan.}

this isn't my first break-up with a tv station.

i vowed to never watch fox again

when david archuleta didn't

win american idol.

i promised myself i would never watch abc

when pushing daisies {possibly the most beautiful tv show ever}

got cancelled.

and now it's your turn nbc {now known to me as No Body Cares...about you}.

how DARE you

get rid of conan.

and for jay leno?

come on.

but...

{always important to find the silver lining}

word on the street

{street=eonline}

is that conan may be headed over to fox.

except that things between me and fox

didn't end well.

except we did rekindle the flame

thanks to glee.

so i guess it's okay.

that's it.

we're back together.

don't screw up fox.

conan,

you are the wackiest guy ever.  your hair is crazy and your jokes are "coo-coo crazy" {natalie original} but you will always be better than leno, nbc, and the tonight show.  now get out there and make us proud.  team coco for life!

forever yours,

paige.

and nbc...

you suck.

{sorry about that naughty word mom.}

p.s. the "street" also says that the lovely idina menzel

{or miss elfaba, for those wicked-awesome fans}

starting shooting an episode of glee. 

yippie for karma...take that jay leno.

good news.

golden globe noms are in!

i don't quite understand my immense excitement for this years academy awards but i don't care.  i am so excited and i don't care who knows it.  i am, however, severley behind on my movie watching.  so if you are in my same predicament, don't fret.  here is a list of the golden globe nominees and the must see movies (my faves are bolded) of the year...

best picture. drama.

Avatar

The Hurt Locker

Inglorious Bastards

Precious

Up in the Air

{confession:  i haven't seen any of these. 

 but i'll guess the winner:  the hurt locker.  i

'll go to the movies more

then make a more educated guess.  okay?}

best picture. comedy.

(500) Days of Summer

The Hangover

It's Complicated

Julie & Julia

Nine

{please please please win.  you are my favorite movie.}

best animated film.

Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs

Coraline

Fantastic Mr. Fox

The Princess and the Frog

Up

{there is something wrong with the world if Up doesn't win.  am i right?}

i definitely get enough tv time.  thank you hulu.  so i am not worried about being behind the time in that area. but if you are behind, click here and get watching.  here are the noms and the must see tv list (according to the globes)...

best tv series. drama.

Big Love

Dexter

House

Mad Men

True Blood

{none are my favorite.  i

 only like funny tv i guess...

mom and dad want house i bet...

but i'll make another uneducated guess:

mad men}

best tv series. comedy or musical.

30 Rock

Entourage

Glee

Modern Family

The Office

{love 30 rock and the office but glee deserves the win.}

happy watching lovelies.  let me know what YOU think!

working girl.

somedays i love my job.  today is one of those days.  i love my job today because i am a fan of arrested development {and you should be too} and i just spoke with a man named michael bluth.  i wonder if he knows how special his name is?  i enjoy this very much {and you should too}.

here...fall in love with arrested development
maebe: do you guys know where i could get one of those gold, T shaped pendants?
michael bluth:  that's a cross.
maebe:  across from where?

...love it yet? {you should}

dwight was right.

a few days ago i wrote down in my writing 2010 notebook that class would be meeting in the library today.  simple enough.  i do know where the library is so i was already ahead of the game.  10:45 rolled around and i though i had better start walking to the library for class.  right then it dawned on me...the library is a rather large building.  multiple floors.  hundreds of people.  no tolerance for crying, even if you are lost and can't find your writing class.  i was screwed.  to make matters worse i missed class for the inauguration of president holland {yes, it was superb} last time so going to class today was a must.  why do i suck at being a college student?  just before i was about to break the "no crying in the library" rule {which i set for myself} i saw a familiar face.  a red headed girl with piercing blue eyes and a rather unique but lovely name usually sits in front of me in my writing class {when. of course, i can actually find my class}.  that same girl, red headed blue eyes, flew right passed me--who was lost and confused only wanting one thing, to find my writing class--and over to the elevator.  hey wait a second, she must know where my class is meeting today!  goodie!  i chased after her and with a winded voice i bellowed where is our class??!
the girl looked at me with a puzzled stare.  i checked my zipper just in case.  
then something inside her ginger colored head clicked.

"oh i think you are looking for my sister...we are twins."

so if any of you saw thursday's episode of the office you can see the irony in this story.  let me refresh your memory...

{as michael is "seducing" a woman at the bar}

dwight:  michael, drop this one.  abort.

michael:  why?

dwight:  i found twins.

michael:  oh my heck {yeah, we all know that's not what he said, but it is what he meant}.  twins!  [to the woman]  i'm sorry, you understand.  nice to meet you!

{cut to michael and dwight staring 
across the room}

dwight:  aren't they magnificent?

michael:  they're men dwight.

dwight:  i love finding a good set of twins.

michael:  something's wrong with you.

so dwight an i are on the same page.  we both love finding a magnificent set of twins.

love at first sight.

i am in love.  so what do you do when you are in love?  write a poem, of course.

there is a humorous  program

that i watch on tv

it makes me laugh and giggle

and goes by the name of glee

there are some things i do not love

like the secret that belongs to quinn

the humor does makes up for that

and how beautiful is finn?

if you have never see it

watch and see how beautiful it is

i promise that in no time

you, too, will say "this show is the shiz!"

{pardon my french}

i {heart} glee

i will keep my phone near by just in case they'd like me to write for the show.