single and no end in sight.

{me playing a game yet lacking game.}

i have zero game. the kind of game defined by urban dictionary as a "measure of smoothness one has with the opposite sex."  yes.  that kind of game.  i lack it, miserably.  it is getting so bad that i may need to get some sort of self help book or something to teach me.  yes.  that bad.  for example...

preface:  i had to work a double at work yesterday.  on the list of things that i wanted to do that day "work a double at work" was in between "wrestle an alligator" and "eat a handful of poison" on said list. so, to cheer myself up, i decided to do just about the hippest thing to do in provo utah.  i took myself to barnes and noble, got myself an izzie and jammed by myself to the new adele cd in the starbucks section with what just might be the most indie children in utah county.  i sat by the window so everyone cool see me being awesome.  there was a beautiful creature in dark rimmed glasses and a stripped sweater in front of me.  i made the obvious decision and sat BEHIND him, instead of BY him.  which was the first of many mistakes...

{about 30 minutes into my starbucks-izzie-jam sesh}

beautiful creature:  {lips moving, no sound coming out due to my headphones still in and adele serenading me with her sweet sound}

me:  how long has he been talking to me.  remove headphones.  pretend i heard him talking.  yeah.  uh. ...

b.c.:  ...yeah so it's really cold in here, huh?

me:  yeah.

b.c.:  i wonder why.

me:  probably because we're sitting by the window.

b.c.:  (probably wondering why i didn't think of something more clever to say) yeah...probably.

me:  why why why am i not more clever!?  {i smile.  i PUT MY HEADPHONES BACK IN MY HEAD AND GO ABOUT MY BUSINESS}

b.c.:  {turns around.}

...

...

...

b.c.:  {gets up and moves to the other side of the room.}

me:  ugh.  {leave barnes and noble.}

the worst part.  adele was playing in starbucks the entire time...meaning i could've left my headphones out the whole time and heard everything the beautiful creature was saying to me the whole time.  basically i could've had a best friend right now had i forgotten my headphones {that i found in my parent's car} at home.  sad day. bad habit.  need help.