Friday, February 19, 2010

my life is {above} average.

we all know about this right?
tres amusant, non?
i feel like those stories came from my mouth,
because odd, awkward, silly things
happen to me basically ever day.
today's focus...
the uvu shuttle.
i ride the shuttle.  all the time.  it makes me feel like i live in a big city where public transportation is the norm.  this is where the majority of my bits come from.  the most interesting people ride the shuttle {another reason why i ride} and the most priceless moments happen inside that wolverine green vehicle.  today, however, there was an abnormal amount of odd riding in the shuttle.  
  • every morning the shuttle driver, who is always wearing sunglasses and looks about the age of my great grandparents, listens to country legends one oh seven point fivei hate country.  and the hate for it grows more every morning.  my hate for that station shrunk a size when this came blaring out of the speakers today "happy straw wrapper appreciation day!"  huh?
  • the bus driver, shades is the name, is on a tight schedule.  at least he drives the shuttle as if he is.  usually he hits curbs, exceeds the limit of speed for such a beastly automobile, cuts in front of people on the roundabout, and today he added to his list of wild shuttle operating.  as a student who was talking on his cell phone while carrying one of those ridiculous backpacks with wheels {come on man, its a couple of books not your vacation suitcase}, yes carrying not pulling, was trying to exit the shuttle at his stop.  it took him some time to get from the back of the shuttle to the door due to his large baggage and cell phone distraction, not to mention all of the people entering the shuttle.  apparently shades thought wheels {man trying to exit shuttle} was taking to long to get off so he shut the doors on him mid-exit.  that upset wheels.  so much so that he tossed his bag out the door {something magnificent must be in that case since he saved it from the closing doors} as he fell to the floor of the uvu-mobile and shouted "i must get off here!"  everyone tried to get shades attention away from country legends and on to wheels who was fuming mad.  eventually he noticed, opened the doors for a split second, and proceeded to anger the surrounding cars with his terrible shuttle skills.
  • a lot of creppin' {flirting, hitting on, ect} goes on around utah county, and especially in the shuttle.  maybe since the seats are made for tiny bums so everyone basically sits atop of each other for the time spent on the shuttle, that triggers the fellas to creep.  i noticed a particularity interesting run in with a creep and his victim today.  the convo went  a little like this...
creeper:  "hey...you are in my english class."
victim:  "no i'm not."
{they didn't even so much as glance at each other for the remainder of the ride.  even when they both got off at the same stop and i assume walked into the same class.  the same english class, that is.}

uvu.  i love you.

4 comments:

Mark said...

You are too funny! MOM

Mark said...

The real Mark, (not the MOM who frequently uses my moniker to comment)said: Paige, these little anecdotes of yours are real gems. You can write like nobody's business. You should write a book, it will become a bestseller, you will get rich, and you will make sure your parents live their remaining years in the lap of luxury. You go girl!
Signed,
The Real Mark

Unknown said...

picture jacker

Virgilicious said...

hahahaha this post made me laugh really hard. haha. oh people are so entertaining.